The book skews high-bourgeois, of course, but accommodates more vulgar sensibilities. Sometimes one encounters charming ruins (The Dating chapter refers to both switchboards and the Internet regarding matters of appropriate communication; every advice is gender-neutral, but most examples are highly gendered.). Nonetheless, Post keeps up with the latest societal developments (“The Thoughtful Family Member” chapter has a section devoted to the basement dweller, although more appropriately named “Adult Children in the Home” - note that this is the 2004 edition).

Norms are a useful fiction that stays invisible until you step out of it. Most of what I read was common sense until it wasn’t. The majority of “The Good Neighbor” chapter seems unhinged to me; yet when I stop and think about it, I can see how it can (maybe) work (the chapter on male dress is crazy though. I don’t think Talibans have as many rules regarding women’s dress). The reading also reframes some behaviors I have seen but couldn’t explain, and adds some new ones to my repertoire.

Depending on where you are on the US-normalized normalcy spectrum (if it even exists), this could be an exotic ethnological read or a way to become better rounded (I did pick up some good advice for situations that had always felt vaguely uneasy to me; I also visited American suburbia and its strange mores). In any case, it gives an opportunity to discover and reflect on situations one will inevitably encounter one day.